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Home » Opinion » Chinese Views
When humble hongbao rite goes very wrong
By Ni Tao |
January 23, 2009, Friday
|
Print Edition
Print Edition
I can hardly recall the last time I received a hongbao or red envelope.
Nor do I exactly remember how many 100-yuan (US$14.60) bills were contained in the little red envelope handed to me by a relative.
All I know is how I disposed of it: Like most peers under the spell of the iconic "leather-clad superheroes" at that time, I splurged all the bounty on a set of Ultraman toys.
They are still kept in good order, even though the red superhero coating has gradually come off. The red color of hongbao, however, remains ever bright.
In fact, with the Spring Festival around the corner and people about to engage in a hongbao-giving frenzy, this earnestly sought-after envelope is bound to glow even more brilliantly.
Without a nephew or a niece, I'm spared the thankless privilege of showing affection for younger relatives by giving them hongbao.
I do, however, consider filial piety an essential obligation and plan to give a hongbao to my 80-something grandma, partly to thank her for looking after me as a toddler.
Not all people are as lucky as I am, though.
In addition to giving to elders, most have to "donate" to children of relatives' - the word "donate" aptly describes the situation of childless givers, who shell out cash but reap nothing in return.
As for the appropriate sum in a hongbao, a few hundred yuan usually will do.
It sounds like peanuts, but multiply it a dozen times, and then even folks flush with cash will frown on such overgenerous payouts.
Besides, at a time when everyone is tightening his or her purse strings, giving hongbao has literally become a "sweet" burden.
The practice itself is not to blame. Giving hongbao to loved ones on important occasions is deeply entrenched.
Despite intermittent polemics regarding its corrosive impact on teenagers' character, the tradition has persisted.
Reciprocity is the linchpin of exchanging hongbaos. It is an informal yet widely accepted etiquette, by which recipients of favors are expected to return to givers something of roughly equal value.
Failure to do so or offering an amount short of expectations will definitely reflect upon the "penny-pinchers."
When it comes to reciprocity in gift exchanges, reading Marcel Mauss might sharpen our insights.
I recall coming across a few lines from "The Gift," an acclaimed work of the French sociologist, to the effect that "free" gifts never exist. Objects that are given away as gifts are never completely separated from the people who swap them.
In other words, in contrast with a commodity economy where ownership rights transferred in commercial transactions are clearly defined, leaving little ambiguity, objects in a gift economy are often considered to be "on loan," rather than "sold" or "ceded" to recipients.
Recipients are subject to a feeling of "gift-debt," and have to be constantly mindful of the price they will pay in terms of social relations if the "debt" is not repaid.
According to Mauss, the obligatory nature of gift exchange, along with the inalienability of gifts to original owners, is inherent in all cultures.
They help enhance social cohesion by fostering more reciprocal deeds and mutual interdependence.
Alas, Mauss's sanguine views on increasing reciprocity through benevolent acts of gift exchange cannot be further from the reality in China.
The problem with hongbao-giving is that too many of us have simply turned it into wild and repulsive potlatch, ostentatious shows of personal wealth or worse - overt extortion, albeit doing so under the veneer of intimate familial bonds and friendship.
An initially virtuous circle, as Mauss argues, gradually degenerates into a vicious one. Ironically, hongbao ends up being associated more with loss of fortune than with auspice.
Nor do I exactly remember how many 100-yuan (US$14.60) bills were contained in the little red envelope handed to me by a relative.
All I know is how I disposed of it: Like most peers under the spell of the iconic "leather-clad superheroes" at that time, I splurged all the bounty on a set of Ultraman toys.
They are still kept in good order, even though the red superhero coating has gradually come off. The red color of hongbao, however, remains ever bright.
In fact, with the Spring Festival around the corner and people about to engage in a hongbao-giving frenzy, this earnestly sought-after envelope is bound to glow even more brilliantly.
Without a nephew or a niece, I'm spared the thankless privilege of showing affection for younger relatives by giving them hongbao.
I do, however, consider filial piety an essential obligation and plan to give a hongbao to my 80-something grandma, partly to thank her for looking after me as a toddler.
Not all people are as lucky as I am, though.
In addition to giving to elders, most have to "donate" to children of relatives' - the word "donate" aptly describes the situation of childless givers, who shell out cash but reap nothing in return.
As for the appropriate sum in a hongbao, a few hundred yuan usually will do.
It sounds like peanuts, but multiply it a dozen times, and then even folks flush with cash will frown on such overgenerous payouts.
Besides, at a time when everyone is tightening his or her purse strings, giving hongbao has literally become a "sweet" burden.
The practice itself is not to blame. Giving hongbao to loved ones on important occasions is deeply entrenched.
Despite intermittent polemics regarding its corrosive impact on teenagers' character, the tradition has persisted.
Reciprocity is the linchpin of exchanging hongbaos. It is an informal yet widely accepted etiquette, by which recipients of favors are expected to return to givers something of roughly equal value.
Failure to do so or offering an amount short of expectations will definitely reflect upon the "penny-pinchers."
When it comes to reciprocity in gift exchanges, reading Marcel Mauss might sharpen our insights.
I recall coming across a few lines from "The Gift," an acclaimed work of the French sociologist, to the effect that "free" gifts never exist. Objects that are given away as gifts are never completely separated from the people who swap them.
In other words, in contrast with a commodity economy where ownership rights transferred in commercial transactions are clearly defined, leaving little ambiguity, objects in a gift economy are often considered to be "on loan," rather than "sold" or "ceded" to recipients.
Recipients are subject to a feeling of "gift-debt," and have to be constantly mindful of the price they will pay in terms of social relations if the "debt" is not repaid.
According to Mauss, the obligatory nature of gift exchange, along with the inalienability of gifts to original owners, is inherent in all cultures.
They help enhance social cohesion by fostering more reciprocal deeds and mutual interdependence.
Alas, Mauss's sanguine views on increasing reciprocity through benevolent acts of gift exchange cannot be further from the reality in China.
The problem with hongbao-giving is that too many of us have simply turned it into wild and repulsive potlatch, ostentatious shows of personal wealth or worse - overt extortion, albeit doing so under the veneer of intimate familial bonds and friendship.
An initially virtuous circle, as Mauss argues, gradually degenerates into a vicious one. Ironically, hongbao ends up being associated more with loss of fortune than with auspice.
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